Today, I was moved by something I saw. While at a soccer game with my daughter, I noticed a Mom with her newborn baby resting peacefully, nestled comfortably above her slightly bulging belly. Mommy and baby appeared so serene and satisfied as they shared this special moment together. Then, my mind was interrupted by the thought of checkout counter tabloids and “health” magazines proffering their advice for sculpting a “post baby body”. Though I have not read any of these articles, one can imagine what advice is given when captions appear such as “Get That Toned Body Back” and “Having a Baby Doesn’t Mean Losing Your Great Body” coupled with photos of models in their skin tight workout outfits exposing enough of their midriff to show their rock hard, digitally enhanced abs. What they likely don’t tell you is:
- The model’s abs were digitally enhanced.
- They searched the planet for the handful of top models who even have a body like that.
- That body need not be your goal anyway.
- A lean, hard body is not nearly as comfortable for a baby to lay on as a slightly squishy Mommy midsection.
- Focusing on your health is important but your shape is NOT!
We all know that 3-5 above are not popular in American culture. Everywhere we turn we see images of perfect bodies (though the definition of “perfect body” varies from culture to culture and generation to generation), commercials for nutritional supplements, fad diet advertisements, and billboards with women so scantily clad that even Southbeach would blush. These images have made the Mommy body an anathema and diminished cultural acceptance of the natural postpartum body. Though cultural norms are important for matters of decorum, daily routine or even public behavior, cultural validation alone should not be the basis for determining the legitimacy of an idea. In this case, the idea is that a Mommy body is okay.
In fact, a Mommy body is beautiful. It shows the hard work, self sacrifice, determination and love invested for 9 months into the life of your baby. Who says you need kickboxing to get “back into shape”? You have a great shape because you got kicked in the tummy for 3 months! Who says you need yoga and stretching to get “back into shape”? Your new shape resulted from 9 lbs. of joy who stretched your tummy for 9 months! Mommy, don’t allow culture to convince you that you need to spend the next 3 months undoing what the last 9 months has created. Your shape is beautiful and memorializes the many months you carried and cared for your child! Celebrate your Mommy body!